raging homones

PMSing -- yups yups I am. Well, even if no one that i've been hanging around with this couple of days think so, I'm having all the usual symptoms. Which, honestly is nothing but terrible. yes... T E R R I B L E. I'm having this insane mood swings that is driving myself crazy, I'm feeling like a bloated balloon, I'm constantly hungry and plagued with fatigue. not good. not good.

I guess feeling like a bloated balloon is ok, especially if you're stuck at home with only the 4 walls of your house staring at you, I mean then you can just spend the whole entire day doing nothing except to look into mirror and gawk at ya gi-normous tummy, gripe about how fat you are and at the same time, eat ice-cream to make yourself feel better. It thus becomes a whole vicious self-torturing cycle that's actually really ok, because, hey you're at home and there's no outside person staring at you. That said though, thus, now you all must understand my predicament.

I have and have been going to work every single day in the last few days. It's been ok till today. I felt like I was like 4 months pregnant or something. and to think as well i felt that I had a swollen face too. And really, working in town doesn't do many miracles for ya self-esteem - it really doesn't make you feel better. There you are, with your self-esteem plummenting and there all these gorgeous girls are - walking and sauntering about, skinny and all nicely made up, trying on skirts that hey, would possibly only fit like the top of your thighs. Boo. Really, I felt like the worst piece of shit today. Boo. Not good. Not good.

On the other hand though, I had the most amazing coffee experience ever. haha. whee. it's generousity to the max. cousin, you ought to work at starbucks more. I'm a starbucks fan for life now. coffee convert. whee. Can you imagine, just because my cousin used to work at starbucks and thus, because of her I know distingushed people at certain outlets - i'm entitled to a triple grande sugar-free vanilla soy latte for free/minimal amount of money if that person is working ---- AHHHH. there's nothing better to start the day.

coffee. coffee. coffee. coffee. cooffffeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Nothing better than when ya on a coffee high to have epiphanies because, they make the most sense. I have come to a conclusion that in the future, if it's time to get a boyfriend (or whatever's the politically right way to say it), Singapore's not going to be the place for me to look. Because, although I'm embarrassed to admit this insignificant fact - looks are rather important in my books. so I have to think that my boyfriend is cute. and because I'm not gorgeous, i'll never be able to find a cute boyfriend.

doesn't make sense right? doesn't really matter i guess. Remember - i'm PMS-ing.