Down in the dumps

[caution: do not proceed if you don't wish to be end being slightly depressed. Yanting is in a very crappy, very homesick, very depressed and horrid mood...if you do read ahead, do so at your own risk, at least though, I know whoever you are, you care enough.]

The weather outside probably reflects best what I'm feeling inside at the moment. Gloomy all the time with occasional (but rare) spurts of sunshine. It's been storming the whole day, the whole day..the sun would come out for 5 minutes and the rain would fall again. The rain would not be in pitter-patters though, it'll be huge, stinging raindrops that appear to be reprimanding you for your stupidity.

Perhaps, I really was stupid. Today was running day and I didn't want to break the running habit, so at the first bout of light, I suited up and went for my run. For two reasons though, it was very stupid. Horrendously stupid. First reason, I ate my brekkie just an hour before, so halfway through the route I was in stitches and I couldn't walk. Second reason, it started pouring at that point where my tummy cramped up, so by that time I got home..I was rain drenched, hands freezing, head hurting and face stinging. How wonderful brilliant right?

Although honestly, it felt really good to be in the pain (no, i'm not masochistic). It felt good to be in pain because it took away the pain I was feeling from elsewhere. That's what I like about working out, you push yourself so hard that just for that temporal moment, you forget where you originally were hurting and your body focuses on somewhere else.

It's truly hard to be in a place where there's no family. No one who really knows you and perhaps, no one who could truely really want you around. I mean Joshua's face when he realised that it was I who had returned instead of his mum...woah...if the looks of little boys could kill.

I had a decent dinner against my will.