One week...

YUPS it's already been that long..i've been home for a week already and sadly, soon it'll be time for me to go home. or rather go back to Australia, somehow home's now 2 places instead of 1, it's a split into 2 kinda feeling...i'm not too afraid of going back now...even though i'll probably kill myself with Lavender perpetually looking over my shoulder..but back here..there are some i know that have managed to successfully get me outta their lives and now i'm back again..i won't mention any names... BUT that's why i'm torn between liking this place and and the place i left and used to dislike to badly. i mean after all, what's the point right???

i try so hard but yah i can't..i got smashed over it. there are too many what ifs.

it's not that i don't wanna tell anyone that i'm back, but rather i think i would rather let them find out for themselves and decide for themselves whether they're willing to let me back into their lives, the already settled "no-yans" lives, i'll be flitting around for the next 5 years..even longer maybe after, so i figured that they wouldn't have to welcome me back into their lives if they didn't want to. Yankee doodles messaged my sister yesterday and asked why i haven't said anything despite everyone knowing that i'm already back...i think especially Yankee Doodles i haven't let know coz' i think his life is good the way it is now..even though i'm running away with dealing from things..i'm not fully recovered yet...not even friends yet. What if.

on a happier note though, i'm getting pampered and having lotsa fun..EATING , EATING.